no no no. wonder why things have been going so wrong for me these days. first thing, my exams. for the past few papers, i've been giving up when im not even half-way through. today's ss paper was the worst of all. all because of my stupid handwriting, my mood was thoroughly spoilt. then began writing nonsensical stuff down. yea, i knew where my mistakes were. but without the kind of 'mood', i really didnt feel like correcting them. so went on writing. when others were busy trying to finish up, i had ample time to rest. seem to take it very easy, but felt so discouraged inside. even tmr's chem paper, i can predict what the result would be. a straight f9. how disheartening.
it's the first time in these 3 years that i slacked so much. to the extend that i cant even be bothered to put in effort to revise or even complete everything during exams. didnt want it this way, but i seriously cant help it. really not in the mood. though impossible, how much i hope time can reverse. i would definitely put in all my effort and focus on my studies right then.
cant decide if i should still study for the other subjects. i want to score, who doesnt... but what's the point when the first few papers are all thrashed up. felt something missing inside me. yet couldn't tell what that is. it's certainly eating into me, making me lose all my mood. it's so seldom that i feel this way. terrible feeling. ='(
